


Sorrow waited, sorrow won

by sandyk



Series: season 3 tried to be canon post eps [20]
Category: Superstore (TV)
Genre: F/M, Post 320
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-20
Updated: 2018-04-20
Packaged: 2019-04-25 11:50:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,165
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14378052
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sandyk/pseuds/sandyk
Summary: "But it's Adam's," she said.





	Sorrow waited, sorrow won

**Author's Note:**

> Not mine, no profit. Title from the national's sorrow. Thanks, A!

"But it's Adam's," Amy said.

Jonah was still just staring. It was like, it was like he'd been run over by a car and he hadn't felt the impact yet. 

"But it's stupid because you're the one I want," Amy said.

"So, what did Adam say? When was this?" He could sense the impact coming at him, like, a steamroller breathing hard against his neck. 

"Oh," Amy said. "The getting pregnant. That was, like, three months ago. Like Valentine's Day, around then. He came over. We had drinks. It was just a one time thing."

"Oh," Jonah said. "Well, you said you wanted more kids. Not with Adam. But you said that."

"Yeah," Amy said. "I don't know what I'm doing." She crossed her arms under her breasts. He wondered if they were bigger. He didn't always notice. He saw her nearly every day. She said, "So you can still keep dating Kelly like we're nothing."

"Are you mad at me?" Jonah felt numb. Numb numb the word was running around his head. Now he'd been spoiled for Terms of Endearment. Well, he'd already known that. "Are you mad at me?"

"I know I don't have the right, I don't, but why are you still dating her?"

Jonah shook his head. "She wants to date me. She says that all the time. I keep cheating on her, emotionally and, and other, and she still wants me. I haven't told her about all of it. But what, do you even care?"

"It's mean to Kelly," Amy said. "That's stupid. I don't care about Kelly. I care about me and it makes me miserable. And I don't get why you're with her. She's annoying."

"She's not annoying," Jonah said. "I've been an ass to her and we should break up but she's not annoying. She's sweet. She keeps trying. She's optimistic and she tries new things."

"Not like you," Amy said. "Not like me."

"I try new things," Jonah said. "I'm the one in a relationship."

"You just said you were going to break up," Amy said. 

He was now feeling the steamroller. He was nauseated. His fingers were tingling. His chest hurt. It felt like a panic attack. It felt like a massive panic attack, and he knew massive panic attacks. He'd had at least four. 

He was going to watch Terms of Endearment as soon as he got home. Wherever he ended up. He said, "I am going to break up with her right now. You do whatever you want."

He turned around and then he turned back around. "I care about you, though, and I guess, congratulations? I know this must be hard for you. And confusing. Something had to be for you to do something. I guess? Sorry, sorry, I don't mean to be mean. Like, not today, not after this, but um."

"What? What um?"

"I care about you, I want you to be happy. Theoretically," he said. Then he leaned over the dumpster and threw up. He felt really dignified about the whole thing. "Okay, that was an overreaction."

"Sorry," Amy said.

He left the mess and grabbed a bottle of Gatorade off the shelf, he just started chugging it. It was really blue. Then he went to find Kelly. "Hey," he said. "I need to move out and we should break up."

She looked at him and blinked a lot. "I'm sorry," he said. "I'm really sorry. I was a dick. You were pretty much right every single time you said I had feelings for Amy. I'm sorry. I'm not saying that to be mean, I'm saying that because I don't want you to think it was you."

Kelly slapped him and kicked his shin. 

He didn't think violence was the greatest solution, in general. He really was a pacifist person. And also an asshole. 

He clocked out and got in his car. He drove to the place where he and Kelly were foolishly living, and he packed hastily. He was wildly overreacting, he thought. But he was ending a five month relationship. He got all his medication out of his secret hiding place. He took two clonazepam and waited to calm down. It wasn't super effective. He wasn't even done packing his car when Kelly got home. She said, "Why are even still here? Oh, and please tell me you're not the father of Amy's baby since Cheyenne told everyone Amy's pregnant."

"She should have told everyone it's Adam's baby. Not me," Jonah said. The clonazepam was definitely kicking in. "But I did cheat on you with Amy. We definitely had an emotional affair."

"Oh, God, shut up. You can get the rest later." 

"Got it," he said. He gathered up everything in his hands and got in his car. He looked in the back seat and thought about how much it reminded him of leaving business school. 

But then he met Amy. And Dina and Mateo and Glenn. And Garrett. 

He drove to Amy's house and parked outside. He didn't see Adam's car but he actually didn't know what Adam's car looked like. He called Amy and she didn't answer. So he left a message. "I just wanted to say, you know, I'm here for you. Sort of. I don't know. No, I'm here for you. I am. But it's weird to me. We had some weird stops and starts. We had sex. And before you had sex with me, you had sex with Adam. Good old Adam. I cheated on my girlfriend. That was a shit move. Am I that person?"

He hung up before he said anything more. 

He was not in charge of her life. He remembered all the times she'd said she was going to do this adventure, get a tattoo, go skydiving. She hadn't even gone back to her college classes. He called her again and got her voicemail again. "Okay, you know, I am a little angry with you. Not because of the pregnancy, but because I genuinely don't understand why you don't see yourself as something who can be, like, Laura Dern. You can be that good. Do you think she's that good? Garrett loves her. Remember that crazy gymnast? Why can't you see that you can actually be the best Amy Sosa in the whole world? You can do extraordinary things. You don't have to be whatever it is you're doing. And I know the same is probably true of me. Like, fine, I'm a failure. And I haven't seen Deerhunter or Jules et Jim, but you know, I have tried a lot of cheeses. You should do more of that. It makes me angry you don't."

He hung up again. He drove away, back to the same motel he'd stayed in his first night in St. Louis. He'd have to find his own place this time. And the clonazepam really kicked in so he laid on the bed without even getting out of his clothes and fell straight asleep.


End file.
